Sitting here thinking

I'm sitting here thinking again. I broke his heart for doubting his love. I hurt him. I never meant to. I think he mad at me and hates me. I'm just thinking cause I text him and call. I get no reply back. I went to his place. He ignore me. He probably wants me to feel the pain. How to feel heartbroken. I told him I miss him.i care for him. I still love him. I am hurting inside. My heart is hurting really bad.💔 I do appreciate his love for me. I'm just thinking and assuming again. I never thought I will fall in love again. But I did. I end up breaking the heart I fell in love with. I'm trying my best. I try to tell him and he ran. I can't belive it. I still love him. But my heart hurts. I know you are hurting to. I want to be with you only! I'm not happy I hurt him! I'm not happy these days.i should stop thinking bad things.

I care for you!
I miss you!
I love you!

I'm not happy how this year is turning out!
my friends bought me a bday vacation. I wasn't going to go. They told me they can't cancel it. There's no insurance on the vacation package. Now I have to go and end up with people I don't like. Who is also going. My year is turning into crap again. I still have a couple weeks to decide.